The Pitch-perfect Pitch?

How do you convince a multi-millionaire to give you their money on a whim, just after hearing you talk for a minute? Why, you need the pitch-perfect pitch! One of the leading gurus on the topic, Oren Klaff will tell you to prey on your audience’s baser instincts, „get to know your inner crocodile”. It’s enough, apparently, to make yourself a prize, create time pressure of the offering and make the investor chase you, not the other way round. Sounds interesting, but perhaps a little too vague? Worry not, we’ll help you right out…

With pitches, there are several main approaches, but still no solid science or a one-size-fits-all template. Instead, if you are willing to learn, there is expert advice out there that will help you get started. For instance, Entrepeneur.com, has 13 tips to get your foot in the door. They, unlike Oren Klaff, don’t want you to tap into your primitive brain, but instead play on the mindset of a typical executive. The tips also tell you to be succinct and create (or use) time pressure to your advantage, but what it all boils down to is the „executive summary” of your proposed service, product or start-up.

Folks at the Entrepreneur know the power of first impressions, so they also throw in some morsels of wisdom like dressing smartly and being very enthusiastic about what you pitch. Far from trite, the last recommendation tells you to let loose your passion and not be worried you come across as unprofessional or too technical. In their experience, being genuinely interested in what you do sells you as much as your start-up idea.

Perhaps most important of their tips, however, is the last one – „show them the exit”. Very few of pitch gurus or pitch advice columns will tell you that, but apparently, it’s what will make the pitched idea better. „Exit” in this sense is what the product will appear in the future and how the investor will know when to reap the biggest rewards. But it is also useful to you, the pitcher. In essence, thinking about the exit strategy will help you understand how your product will evolve, so you know your outgoing steps (further growth? retargeting? pulling out of the market?) along with the minutiae of the offering itself. The crucial question is then, „what will my pitch look like in 5 years?”, and you better have the answer in 5 minutes, not 5 years!

Ryan Robinson, a content marketing consultant working for the world’s largest experts, has some similar advice over at Inc.com. His main idea about pitching is that you never know when the opportunity will present itself, so you should simply always have a pitch at the ready. Since not all pitches are born equal, but all land on human ears, he proposes you learn by heart the basic principles of the pitch – that it has to be short, it has to tell a story, it has to mix emotion and logic, and focus on specific benefits (either to the investor, or to the end customer). Putting these ideas in practice is a little harder, but each of these points has an inherent value. For instance, emotion is required because pitches are notorious for being a sort of „impulse buys„, so if your idea is simply liked and elicits a positive emotion, the person in front of you will try to find rationalizations on why they really need this pitch. It rarely works the other way round!

Oddly enough, despite telling you to always be ready and prepared for elevator pitch and the like, Inc.com also provides a link to a very detailed, highly informative guide on how to create a pitch deck, as they are quite certain at some point you’ll need more than just 60-second talk to convince the powers that be to back your product. Just in case you find yourself with time to conduct a full presentation, they say, you need to be ready with a 5-7-word blurb that sums up your idea as an intro, about 10-20 well crafted slides that show a mock-up of your product, present business rationalizations and customer profiles, as well as possible revenue streams, and tell a bit about yourself and why the investor should choose you. A very important part of it is showing at least some of how your product actually works – or present a prototype, like this one.

One of their most interesting points is also about presenting your ask clearly. Don’t be embarrassed about the numbers and explain exactly what type of backing structure is needed – be it a full partnership, an angelic investment, profit-sharing scheme etc. VC’s are only interested in how much money can be made, so be as optimistic as possible with real profits or growth opportunities.

So, here we are: you have prepared the pitch and crafted is as well as the gurus have told you. But as nearly every other pitch bible out there will also tell you, you need to rehearse, rehearse, rehearse – so definitely do that. You cannot afford to get bogged down or side-tracked, nor should you ever find yourself tongue-tied. The person or people listening to your pitch will make it very hard for you to stay on track or proceed – they will be poking holes in your precious brainchild to find out if you have anticipated everything and know how to make them more money. But if you did your homework and read the above, you should secure that funding for yourself (and big returns for them), no problem!

VOCABULARY

to convince sb to do sth – przekonać kogoś do (z)robienia czegoś
on a whim – na życzenie, ni z tego, ni z owego
pitch-perfect – doskonały, perfekcyjnej jakości
pitch – gadka sprzedażowa, krótka prezentacja produktu/pomysłu (zachęcająca do zainwestowania pieniędzy)
to prey on sth – żerować na czymś
base instinct – wrodzony instynkt
inner – wewnętrzny
prize – nagroda
time pressure – presja czasowa
…not the other way round – …a nie odwrotnie
vague – niejasny
worry not! – nie martw się!
solid – pewny, solidny
one-size-fits-all – uniwersalny, nadający się do wszystkiego (pot.)
template – schemat
expert – specjalistyczny, fachowy
tip – porada
to get one’s foot in the door – zaczepić się, ustawić się
to tap into sth – skorzystać z czegoś, wykorzystać coś (np. dotąd niewykorzystanego)
to play on sth – wykorzystać coś, obrócić na własną korzyść
mindset – sposób myślenia, mentalność
executive – tu: dyrektor (firmy), menadżer wyższego szczebla
succinct – zwięzły
to do sth to sb’s advantage – zrobić coś z korzyścią dla kogoś/na czyjąś korzyść
to boil down to sth – sprowadzać się do czegoś
executive summary – podsumowanie dla menadżera, krótkie podsumowanie (bez zbędnych szczegółów)
entrepreneur – przedsiębiorca
first impression – pierwsze wrażenie
morsel of wisdom – tu: mądra porada
smartly – elegancko, starannie
far from X… – wcale nie X…
trite – sztampowy, wyświechtany
to let sth loose – uwolnić coś, dać czemuś upust
to come across as X – pokazać się jako X, dać się poznać jako X
genuinely – autentycznie
advice column – rubryka porad (w piśmie)
sense – tu: znaczenie
to reap rewards – zebrać plony (wysiłków), zebrać zyski (z inwestycji)
in essence – faktycznie, w gruncie rzeczy
exit strategy – strategia wyjścia
outgoing – wychodzący, ustępujący
retargeting – zmiana celu/grupy docelowej
to pull out – wycofać się
minutiae – szczególiki, drobiazgi
crucial – zasadniczy, podstawowy
content – zawartość, treść
at the ready – w pogotowiu, pod ręką
not all Xs are born equal – są X i X, X X-owi nierówny
to land on sb’s ears – zostać wysłuchanym przez kogoś
by heart – na pamięć (np. nauczyć się)
principle – zasada, reguła
to put sth in practice – wcielić coś w życie
inherent – właściwy (dla czegoś), nieodłączny
notorious for sth – znany z czegoś
impulse buy – zakup pod wpływem chwili
to elicit sth – wywołać coś (np. emocje)
to find rationalizations – znaleźć racjonalizacje (dla czegoś)
the other way round – w drugą stronę, odwrotnie
oddly enough… – choć to może wydać się dziwne,…
elevator pitch – bardzo krótka (poniżej kilku minut) gadka sprzedażowa (np. w trakcie wspólnej jazdy windą z potencjalnym inwestorem)
…and the like – i inne/inni tego typu…
guide on sth – poradnik do czegoś/o czymś
deck – tu: zestaw materiałów/slajdów
at some point – w pewnym momencie
the powers that be – możni (tego świata), osoby wpływowe
to back sth – wesprzeć coś, sfinansować
to conduct sth – przeprowadzić coś
blurb – notka reklamowa
intro – wprowadzenie
mock-up – makieta, atrapa
business rationalization – uzasadnienie biznesowe
revenue stream – źródło przychodu/dochodów
ask – prośba (o wsparcie finansowe) (US)
embarrassed – zażenowany, skrępowany
be it … or… – czy to (będzie/by było) … czy…
angelic investment – tu: inwestycja anioła biznesu
profit-sharing – z udziałem w zyskach
VC (venture capitalist) – inwestor kapitału wysokiego ryzyka
to rehearse – ćwiczyć, przeprowadzać próbę (np. prezentacji)
to afford to do sth – móc sobie pozwolić na (z)robienie czegoś
bogged down – zawalony (czymś), pogrążony (w czymś)
to get side-tracked – odejść od tematu, stracić wątek
to find oneself tongue-tied – nie móc wykrztusić z siebie (ani) słowa
to stay on track – pozostać na właściwym tropie, nie zboczyć z tematu
to proceed – kontynuować (robienie czegoś)
to poke holes in sth – szukać w czymś dziury/niedociągnięć
brainchild – pomysł (czyjś)
to anticipate – przewidzieć
to do one’s homework – odrobić pracę domową, dobrze się przygotować